It was a Monday morning just like any other Monday…except for the fact that I got up at 5am to drive to Charlotte to a conference at a church that I did not know much about and where I knew no one. The only thing I knew was that I was supposed to go. It was a “healing conference” and since I had been struggling with an auto immune issue and chronic pain for years that no doctor had been able to help…I figured I’d give the Master Healer a shot:). I thought it would be a few hundred people, all perhaps sitting around sharing our stories and what we were there to be healed of and then pray for each other. What I drove up to was people directing traffic into the parking lot for all 1800+ attendees from over 32 countries. I had no idea what I was in for, nor did I know that I was about to embark on a journey in which there would be no going back. The healing I was about to receive was going to go much deeper than my physical health…it was going to go to my heart.
I sat there for three days, amongst strangers and nationalities, being touched from the moment I walked in the door with the bigness of God and the power of the Only One who can create the kind of change in a person’s heart and body that brings life…real life. I mean, I’ve had the chills during worship, I’ve had moments you know can be only God, I have felt His presence and done ministry and been to every Beth Moore bible study you can name. It wasn’t like I didn’t know Him…I had just never encountered Him in this way.
I have written about this part before, but I will never forget the night that during worship with my eyes closed, my spirit soaring, my senses (both physical and spiritual) being awakened on many levels, I SAW Him. My eyes were not open…but my spiritual eyes could see Jesus walking towards me from the back of the room. He was walking towards my back. How did I know? I can’t tell you that…but He was there. As I saw Him walk towards me, getting closer and closer, I knew He was coming straight for me. Isn’t that just like Him…He comes for the one. As He approached me and walked up to my right hand side, every cell in my body was vibrating, every hair was on end, and every tear that I could cry was pouring out.
Many of the things that happened over the next couple of days are unexplainable. The prophetic realm opened up to me in a way it never had before…hearing the Lord’s voice felt like a constant and His presence was like a blanket. People I had never seen and never even spoken to would come up and speak words to me that there was no way they could have known to speak….many were the same words…a theme the Lord wanted to make sure I was getting loud and clear: “it has to go from your head to your heart.” Yes, He was after my heart…still is…and in a whisper He asked me: “will you come with me?” and before I could even think of what all that meant I answered “yes.”